Thursday, November 4, 2010

worth the wait...

My thoughts right now are a bit jumbled, so I beg for your grace as I pen my unorganized heart onto this page. 5 loads of dirty laundry await me as well as a clock that is ticking minutes away before my one year old awakes and I lose the opportunity to write this post.

I woke up early this morning to spend a little quiet time with God and to finish up this week's Bible study lesson. I can't help but marvel at the way God speaks to me through the pages of a Bible study that was written years ago, and through the lives of Biblical characters generations ago...with such divine relevancy. I love how lessons I am beginning to learn and truths I am discovering and embracing on my own, in my "now," are reinforced and cemented moments, days, and weeks later through the people and things the LORD places before me. He knows what He is doing. I see the pieces of the puzzle come together...."A-ha" moments.
I serve a very wise God.

We've been studying the life of Joseph and how he was betrayed, deceived, wrongfully accused and imprisoned for two full years and how agonizing the wait must have been for him. One of the questions asked us to reflect on an occasion in our own lives in which we have had to wait on something that we feel has great significance for our future. The waiting mode can be taxing, exhausting and wearisome. I've been there. I'm there. Just recently, as described a couple of posts ago, the LORD has freed me from some of the burdens I was focusing on while in my own "waiting mode." It's been liberating.

We dove into the importance of the "wait" and how we are not forgotten....How we must often be humbled and taken into low positions before being exalted and lifted into places of high position. How during these times the LORD is molding us and preparing us for our destiny. Beth Moore writes:
"Sometimes we can be so busy looking for what is missing in our lives that we miss Who is busily present in our lives. We're looking for God to do us future favors when He's trying to open up our eyes to present ones. Remember, God purposes to use every second of a divinely-ordained wait to build us into the individuals our future demands we be. One most peculiar and exquisite experience of the faith is realizing that while you haven't seen the answers or the way you should take, you've learned to see the light of God Himself. Right there in the blindness of your circumstances."

I have been learning this daily...understanding my need and the importance of seeking Him alone above what He can offer. Oh yes, He is unmistakably my "more than enough."

As I am processing all that's been happening along my journey, where I've gone wrong, how much time I've wasted...I think to myself, how often do we shape and mold and try to create masterpieces of our own lives? How often do we try to play the role of "Potter." We sell ourselves, put our unfinished selves out there on the sales rack waiting for that miraculous moment when the waiting ceases, the trials are just a glance in our rearview mirrors, and our destiny has been fulfilled. But then often find that in our unpolished, unrefined form, the wait continues. The blessing, the destiny or "place" we thought we'd be in life has not arrived. We feel our shelf-life has already expired and that life has window-shopped right by us because we rushed, took control, and tried to force the Potter into completion.

Day by day I am learning that in many ways, it is more about the wait...the journey...the shaping and molding that so necessarily takes place. A lesson I re-learn over and over again. I'm learning that much of life is about choice and discipline and submission matched by an astounding amount of free-flowing grace. That my prayer shouldn't always be about provision, protection, deliverance and blessing but rather about seeking Him alone...about having a teachable spirit that seeks and is receptive to God's molding of me in the present moment. That I live a life in the Spirit, filled by Him, being used by Him, and bringing glory to Him.
Perhaps you find yourself in a "waiting mode" as well...Waiting for that blessing, that answer, for healing, for the hardship to pass, the relationship to be reconciled, the spiritual growth to "happen," or for the mountaintop to appear. Know that He has purpose in your wait. Seek to embrace what He wants you to learn and who He wants you to become during this wait.
My prayer over my family as of late has been just this.
Join me in joyfully and humbly leaning into His faithfulness
and trusting in His sovereignty.
It's worth the wait.
He's worth the wait.
Be strong in the LORD today!

3 comments:

  1. Amanda -- as a planner, I want to scream! God always keeps me guessing at what's next... but you're so right -- He's worth the wait. I look back on things that have happened in my life and while they seemed bad at the time, I understand now that it was in preparation for what's next. Thanks for sharing this post. I needed to hear it as I seek answers in Italy. I feel I will be in this waiting period for a while... Good reminder that the journey is not a waste.

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  2. Thanks for your amazing words...you spoke right to my heart. There are so many things going on in my life that I just need to wait on and remembering God hasn't forgotten me. I hope God's continues to bless you in your wait :)

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  3. Ah, sweet friend. I'm so glad you postponed those 5 loads of laundry to share your heart. I too have been amazed at the timing of our lessons and how specific they have been in their application to my life circumstances. I cannot get over the way the Spirit works.
    I love how you explained our own attempts to take control of our lives as we grow impatient...You verbalized feelings that have swirled on the inside, but I have never been able to articulate. And the Beth Moore quote...wow! I didn't get that far this week (I only made it through the first half of lesson 3); I'm going to have to go back & study the rest of this week's material.

    He is SO worth the wait. Every second. Oh to trust him more.
    Thank you so much for your words of encouragement today and your transparency.
    I love you!

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