Monday, July 30, 2012

to give into grace...

this 37.  it roared in like a leo lion.  before my bare feet even met the stairs in the morning, i found myself in wondered weepiness.  three little gifts came marching into the room singing birthday wishes and wrapping me in pajama hugs. my heart swelled with gratitude, my eyes brimmed with tears.  i felt i had every gift i ever wanted. oh, to stay in the moment.

this grace. crashing in on us one moment, as wave hits shoreline.  quietly encircling us the next, daring to linger much longer than it should, as does the indian summer sun.

this life is no dress rehearsal.  but a live performance. i don't want to miss my mark.  my storyline outlined and Authored by the Poet, with finesse and rhythm divine.  a grace that ebbs and flows through the chapters and lines of my days. direct me to live fully and freely in You through each scene, to not idle in intermission.

and on this birthday i'm alive to the fact that indeed i am still clay.  viewed not by the Sculptor as a state of lump and rubble. but through Grace eyes that see me as art. yet to be finished. thank You that You see what i am yet to be. Lord, help me to see myself through Your lens. for this i struggle. oh, i do. i know there's beauty yet to be carved. your Book says. toward myself and others, furnish me with grace eyes.

the gifts of my day were many.  the ones intangible carrying the most weight. words. life and love delivered.  beginning with this man i share life with.  who in searching for old treasure, is searching my heart.  gifting me with much more than the antique balance scale that came boxed and wrapped before me.  for it symbolizes things that are immeasurable.  our sin which can't outweigh His grace.  our darkness that can't outweigh His light.  our  fear which can't outweigh His hope. and Love. love that first pierced hands, to forever pierce my heart. let me not forget. may it beat mightily for You each day You give me breath.

and then there's today. monday.  my man gets ready to leave us this morning, after 3 days of fullness and family.  the pace of his movement quickens and i know departure's upon us.  the clock refuses to stand still no matter how i try to will it.  i know too soon we'll bid our somber goodbye. as he moves onward to provide.  i thank him for leaving. for the bread on the table. i sense rainclouds lurking. ready to roll in and paint my today in long and lonely. i will not grab my umbrella, or give into monday.  Lord, shine down on this place.

as the graces of yesterday threaten to fade quietly into the memory of her setting sun, give me eyes afresh to behold the graces rising in on today. to gather and savor the droplets of beauty that cover the lawn of my life with today's morning dew. to give into this grace. and behold the immeasurable.




3 comments:

  1. I love your heart ... even more beautiful than your sweet face. I adore you!

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  2. have mercy...this was so lovely. eloquent in voice and shimmering in truth - much like you.
    i literally held my breath as I read.

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  3. Happy late birthday! Your words are as always beautiful and move me! xoxo

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